Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Losing Daddy...

Life is so unpredictable...you might be laughing ur ass out today n d next day u might be crying so hard tht its so hard breath...thts what happened to me...i remember clearly tht night...me n my frenz were crazy..recorfing our version of harlem shake..really enjoyed ourselves like typical teenagers...it was so normal..went to bed tht night n slept off...then the phone rang at 5am..its frm daddy..theyre suppose to go bck kuala lumpur tht day frm jakarta..they went for holliday..i was pissed off obviously..who dare to disturb me sleeping.. my sister was on th line..i thought they forgot their booking number or something..she asked me where was i n all..i still was blurr..n i scolded her..then she say it...'meen..abba(daddy) is in icu..pls come now'..i cud barely hear her in tears..i start breathing heavily...no words could describe how i felt...i asked wat happened n all..but i still cudnt believe my ears..its like..nahh..this cant happen to me..not me..not my abba..i took 8am flight to jakarta...my heart was aching so damn bad..i was praying so hard...then i arrived in d hospital..i saw abba lying there...thats the worst sight ever...just last week we were bullying each other...laughing...playing..now hes there lying..wth is this...why? I really cant hold myself any longer...i just cry out loud...i was too depressed..can u believe it..thts my dad over there!! Not other guy..my dad..its too devastating tht moment...my fmly calmed me down..he was in coma...we brought him bck to malaysia n hes been hospitalized there..every1 came..calming me down..but hey u guys know it wont work...vr talking bout my dad here..the only guy ive loved in my life.. my hero..the man who treat me like a princess..how m i suppose to live...i was praying so hardly for a miracle to happen..but of coz miracles doesnt exist..he passed away after 17 days...by tht time ive already thought of giving up mh evrything..my studies..my life..but then wat will happen to mom..n its my dad's dream to see all his 3 angels to b doctors..trust me tht my only reason living...ive been cutting myself..it makes me happy..yea call me crazy...its been 1 month plus..n im much stronger now..in fact i am a strong girl to start with...ill b there for my mum n sis..ill cheer every1 around me with my smile n laughter n crazyness...no1 wud have any slightest idea tht im actlly very hurt deep inside..i miss him every single day...every1 has to go one day. Its my dad's turn now..next mite be me..or you..ull nvr know...

1 comment:

  1. innalillah wainnalillah ilahirojiun.

    my condolence. I know it's hard, but the only thing that I should just say is, be strong, my friend!

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